its getting hard to breathe with the way life has been going latly. yeah i know my last blog was so good and up beat but im falling and im useing everything i have to stay up. i want to be positive and i don't want to be negitive and sad all the time. my home life is getting the best of me and i don't know how to change it, other then moving out but thats so much easier said then done. im beleiving in myself and others around me i just have this pit in my stomach about something and i don't know what. i feel like ive lost someone and in a sense i have but not really. i want to be happy and smiley i want to be aidy a year ago. bleh. i feel like i should be on meds or something.. okay so maybe thats over exagerating a little but still. if i loose the one person on this earth because of the way im being and how my life is going right now i think ill jump out a 5 story window.... i hate even thinking that. i hate watching myself drive someone away when really im trying to pull them closer i guess i just don't know how. im stressed and trying my best to gasp for air. i need kenny in my life and if anything happens i don't know what ill do. ive fucked up alot and i have no way what so ever of fixing it and for all of you who think im a whore NO i didn't cheat on him thats the last thing i would ever do. well its not even the last thing because it wouldnt ever even happen . i know my blogs suck i just dont' know what else to write.
peewee is good and chasing her tale right now... ha.
smiling is one way to cure the world.
im still looking up regaurdless.
1 comment:
Im not going anywhere love. Trust me on that. I just wanna help you with your hard times and sometimes you push me away or give me a hard time because of something someone else did.
Im understanding, we will make it.....
Im in love with you lady<3
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